Here's a Few For Us Signmakers

[fwharris]

DON'T STICK YOUR ELBOW
OUT SO FAR
IT MAY GO HOME
IN ANOTHER CAR.
BURMA SHAVE

TRAINS DON'T WANDER
ALL OVER THE MAP
'CAUSE NOBODY SITS
IN THE ENGINEER'S LAP
Burma Shave

SHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSH
BY MISTAKE
SHE THOUGHT IT WAS
HER HUSBAND JAKE
Burma Shave

DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT
Burma Shave

DROVE TOO LONG
DRIVER SNOOZING
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
IS NOT AMUSING
BurmaShave

BROTHER SPEEDER
LET'S REHEARSE
ALL TOGETHER
GOOD MORNING, NURSE
Burma Shave

CAUTIOUS RIDER
TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
AND A LITTLE MORE STEER
Burma Shave

SPEED WAS HIGH
WEATHER WAS NOT
TIRES WERE THIN
X MARKS THE SPOT
Burma Shave

THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
OF PAUL FOR BEER
LED TO A WARMER
HEMISPHERE
Burma Shave

AROUND THE CURVE
LICKETY-SPLIT
BEAUTIFUL CAR
WASN'T IT?
Burma Shave

NO MATTER THE PRICE
NO MATTER HOW NEW
THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
IN THE CAR IS YOU
Burma Shave

A GUY WHO DRIVES
A CAR WIDE OPEN
IS NOT THINKIN'
HE'S JUST HOPIN'
Burma Shave

AT INTERSECTIONS
LOOK EACH WAY
A HARP SOUNDS NICE
BUT IT'S HARD TO PLAY
Burma Shave

BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVER'S CODE
Burma Shave

THE ONE WHO DRIVES
WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING
DEPENDS ON YOU
TO DO HIS THINKING
Burma Shave

CAR IN DITCH
DRIVER IN TREE
THE MOON WAS FULL
AND SO WAS HE.
Burma Shave

PASSING SCHOOL ZONE
TAKE IT SLOW
LET OUR LITTLE
SHAVERS GROW
Burma Shave

[fwharris]

I'm not saying lets kill all the stupid people...I'm just saying lets remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out..

[ladjr]

I'm not saying lets kill all the stupid people...I'm just saying lets remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out..

I agree. I have always said a way to solve the traffic problem is a IQ test for a license. and there would be a lot less drivers

[dltccf]

I saw one like this on woodworking for mere mortals a while back and I had to make a carvewright version. I am carving it now. I will post a picture when it is finished.

dave

and finished

[cnsranch]

Some new ones......

LIFE THOUGHTS BY 'DUCKY'

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it. So I said 'Implants?' She hit me. Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America ? When I was young we used to go 'skinny dipping,' now I just 'chunky dunk.' I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place! Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN, AMEN! Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference. Wouldn't you know it.... Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever. Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison? A completely brilliant question!!!!!!! Bumper sticker of the year: 'If you can read this, thank a teacher - and, since it's in English, thank a soldier' Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside? Another completely brilliant question!!!! And remember: Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

[fwharris]

Some great ones Jerry!!!

[jaroot]

If government is the answer, it was a stupid question!

[Bigtyme]

Thanks for the smile, Jaroot. That is a good one....

[jaroot]

I carry a gun because I'm too young to die and too old to take a beating.

[aokweld101]

George Washington didn't use the freedom of speech he just shot them.